miscellaneous (and I do mean miscellaneous: there’s all kinds of good stuff in here–there’s an arrest warrant, amazing CVS savings, one funny story on stealing political signs, and another funny story on election night party ideas. You should definitely read this post, even if you hate me after the last entry! ;)

This morning we actually remembered the time change, got up, got ready, and headed out the door to visit a church.  It wasn’t quite that simple, actually.  Somewhere in there I tried (and failed) to get Jack down for a nap, so during the second half of the morning rush I was holding him in one arm and trying to finish getting ready with the other (I have decided, btw, that he is kind of like a little tree frog, and I am his tree).  Also, I have somehow contracted a wicked case of PMS, and I was, as my friend Kellie would say, a holy mess (wait, is that right Kellie?  Now that I write it out the adjective doesn’t look right.  Please insert the correct adjective if I’ve missed it).  Whatever the case, I was a mess.  I should be eternally happy since technically there are millions of endorphins bouncing off the nerve endings in my brain (or however that works) from all of the Halloween chocolate I have eaten.  But alas, even chocolate isn’t helping.  We finally got ourselves out the door, approximately 5 minutes later than we should have left, and I was not happy about the whole thing.  I generally dislike visiting new churches, and to walk in late makes me feel even more self-conscious.  Matt knew I wasn’t happy (poor soul), so he was trying his hardest to get us there…perhaps a little too quickly.  A cop pulled us over and informed Matt that he had clocked him going 42 in a 30.  Amélie was instantly terrified and started to cry, so I raised my voice tone a notch and cheerfully declared that it was no big deal that we had just been pulled over and that our weekly food budget (at least) was going to be blown on a stupid speeding ticket (I didn’t word it like that exactly).  We were, oh-so-thankfully, blessed with the nicest (and I mean nicest) cop in the whole state, b/c not only did he not care that we did not have current insurance information in the car, but he also let us off with a warning.  However, as he handed Matt the warning, he also glibly informed him that there was a warrant out for his arrest in the next state.  I must have sucked all of the oxygen in the car in one large, noisy gasp, b/c instantly Amélie, once again, dissolved into tears–and this time she was a wee bit more hysterical.  I hope (dear God, how I hope) that she doesn’t know what “warrant for arrest” means and that she will not go to school tomorrow and tell her very sweet teacher and equally sweet classmates that her daddy has a warrant out for his arrest.  We have never been in such a predicament before!  Matt is in this legal predicament b/c he didn’t pay a parking ticket.  Yes, indeed, folks, my husband is a marked criminal.  In fact, he’s out with our two kids and the kid of another friend at this moment (Lindsey and Patrick, would you have let your child loose into my criminal husband’s hands had you known his shady past?), so for all I know they are all sitting forlornly in a jail cell right this minute.  Actually, the only way he can be arrested is if he crosses over into the next state, so I think we will steer clear of State Line Road for the time being.  His parking ticket, btw, is from our head-fracturing incident with Jack.  Matt parked, apparently illegally, in the very full parking garage of the hospital after he had dropped his hysterical wife off at the ER’s door.  He of course wanted to hurry back in to see if his little boy was going to be OK, and that was the only parking space around.  What, exactly, was he supposed to do?  Calmly cruise the parking garage and wait for a parking space to open while he is fearing for his son’s life?  Who would do that?  We plan on appealing that ticket, but we just haven’t gotten around to it yet.  Now that little issue is Priority #1. 

This afternoon I decided to do my weekly grocery shopping.  How I wish I enjoyed grocery shopping.  I always think  that I am going to enjoy myself b/c I am actually alone.  However, approximately 30 minutes into the trip I always feel hemmed in and stressed out.  I hate it.  The only store I enjoy visiting these days is CVS.  I am not the amazing CVS shopper that some people are, but I try.  This week, for example, using some coupons and the CVS bucks from my last visit, I bought four 12-packs of Coke products, one package of snack-size Teddy Grahams at 50% off (leftover Halloween treats), one 3-pack of Ivory Soap, one bottle of children’s vitamins, a package of 3×5 dividers, and one tube of Crest Pro-Health Whitening toothpaste–all for $12.75.  That’s a deal!  What makes it even more of a deal is that I got $9.49 back in CVS bucks, so technically I just spent $3.26.  AMAZING!  I know.  I was very happy.  I wish my trip to the grocery store was as inexpensive, but alas, it was not. 

Now I am going to leave you with two funny election stories I heard in the past two days.  The first one, here,  is about the lengths people have gone to secure their political signs after having them stolen.  It’s really, really funny.  This segment struck a chord w/ me b/c my Obama sign was stolen a couple of weeks ago by some wicked McCain supporter (and then, I might add, a very saintly Obama supporter actually bought me a replacement.  Doesn’t that just warm your heart?).  So…if you stole my sign think again before stealing it again.  I now have a few tricks on sign-protection up my sleeve, and I’m not afraid to use them.

The second funny thing I would like to share with you is another NPR segment on what to do on election night to spice up your time glued to CNN (unless you are a McCain supporter, of course, and then you’ll be glued to Fox).  Check it out here.  From bingo (just think how much fun it would be to call out “BINGO!” after filling in your last space with a chip on “battleground,” “exit polls,” “electoral map,” or “271”)…to your own blank coloring page of a map of the United States that you can color in blue or red as the night progresses, you are sure to find a way to make election night just a little more fun.


7 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Todd on November 2, 2008 at 7:46 pm

    We are of the MSNBC Obama clan…


  2. Oh, sorry, Todd! I didn’t mean to leave your clan out. In our household I have a thing for Campbell Brown and Matt has a thing for A.C., so it’s CNN for us. 😉


  3. That is hysterical! I hope Matt can get his ticket resolved easily. We’ve had two situations like that . . .First, JD received a letter from some little podunk town in Tennessee saying he is wanted for back child-support. JD did not see the humor in it and fired off a nasty letter, threatening legal action. I (the cooler head) said just fax proof of you identity and it will probably be cleared up easily. It was. Then, the day before Jacob was born, Harris County TX called to inform us that JD had an arrest warrant out for an unpaid speeding ticket. What’s funny is JD had stood in line at the courthouse and thought it was taken care of . . . so I jump in the car, head to downtown Houston to pick him up and get him to the courthouse before it closes for the 4th of July holiday weekend (all the while 40 weeks pregnant in 104 degree heat) so he can get it straightened out. I was NOT risking him missing Jacob’s birth b/c he was in jail somewhere!!!!
    Way to go on the CVS steals. I didn’t know they had such great savings! Have you ever done the grocery game? I did that for a while and really did save money, but the Dillon’s closest to me went out of business, so I’m back to Walmart. HOWEVER, now that I am becoming so convicted to eat local foods, I’m going to rethink that. But that is another email. 🙂


  4. Well, I am happy to announce that your criminal hubby brought my baby back safe and sound…no sear-her-mind-forever prison encounters (that I know of) AND I didn’t even read this post until much, much later, so there was no panic happening on this end 🙂 I still like your criminal family member, and there is no judgment here, friend. No judgment here.
    Oh politics…well…I still don’t know where I stand and so I simply have nothing to say…one way or another. But, I thought you’d like to know that I read your blog and L’dOL’d (that would be past tense for LOL)! Love ya and your felon fam!


  5. and the CVS thing: I’d say you’re a pretty savvy coupon excavator…that’s what I like to call it, anyway. I haven’t even looked at the flyer yet.


  6. Posted by manhattandoula on November 2, 2008 at 8:33 pm

    So funny! Thanks for all the laughs! Now I don’t hate you for your last post anymore.


  7. Posted by Kellie on November 21, 2008 at 3:14 pm

    “Hot mess” and “holy hell” are my catchphrases of late. 🙂

    I can’t believe my son goes to school with a child who’s dad is a wanted man. Does Mrs. J know about this?


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